The Grand Yuletide Caper
A time fer joy and merry moods
A clear and frosty winter day
With snowy crystals in the air
When we will all go out ter play
No finer time fer children small
No finer day ter run ahead
Ter pat some snow into a ball
And throw it at yer best friend’s head!
But there is one who walks alone
Who never comes ter laugh and play
A lad with ragged and dirty clothes
His family is poor, they say
His hands are blue from winter cold
A hungry look is in his eyes
And when the others eat their food
He turns away and softly cries
A silence falls upon the fields
The children hang their heads with shame
Them never met the lad with smiles
Them never called him by his name
And up ahead them days of yule
With garments new, with food and toys
How long them days would be fer one
Who never ever saw such joys?
But even minds of hobbits small
Are home ter thoughts both sweet and grand
The children huddle by the fire
Then draw up an impressive plan
They’ll run fer home and get their toys
They’ll raid them pies that stand ter cool
They’ll find the brightest clothes they have
And give the lad a lovely yule!
But there’s a danger to their plan
A thing ter overcome tonight
Their parents surely won’t agree
Ter do what children think is right
The dog agrees ter help them out
Ter lure them grownups far away
He barks and yells and nips their heels
“There’s goblins, fire and disarray!”
It works! Their parents storm ahead!
And so the children go ter work
They enter all their homes with sacks
And well inside them go berserk
With ladders, ropes and sturdy chairs
Them even reach the highest shelves
Where food and clothes and presents dear
Are hid from children like themselves
A sleigh is dragged into the yard
It’s filled with sacks and crates of food
A pony comes ter help them out
It must have felt that yuletide mood!
With lanterns lit and cowbells near
The children hop into the sleigh
Through laughter, song and merriment
The pony hauls them all away
A cold and murky hobbit hole
Where joy has rarely been around
A family stares into the night
When startled by the strangest sound
A merry song and jingly bells
A lot of knocks upon their door
A stream of children flows inside
And sacks are emptied on the floor
The family that once was poor
Are met with riches, joy and song
But grander still than presents now
A sense that even they belong
But oh, a bark outside the door
And stomps of tired grownup feet
The children stop and swallow hard
Their parent’s wrath they now would meet
With hanging heads and trembling lips
The children must confess their crimes
Their parents shake their heads and sigh
Then laugh and join the happy times
“We’re proud of yer, our rascals dear”
“Yer shown us what is right and good”
“Ter care fer others during yule”
“Ter share yer riches, clothes and food”
The stove is lit, the brandy served
The food is shared by all inside
The toys are played with all night long
The clothes are worn with newfound pride
No grander feast was ever seen
No presents ever felt so dear
No lonely more the lad would feel
Embraced by yule and hobbit cheer
The text and drawing are from Miss Lina's Burrow.
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